Heart's Desire

My favorite verse in the entire Bible (I guess I have a lot ot them) is Psalm 37:4---"Delight in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart." I stumbled on this verse when I was a young widow and single mom. I was searching for an identity, direction, a purpose. When I buried my husband, I buried with him our plans for the future, our goals together and a lot of my identity. I remember being a bit disconcerted by the verse because I really didn't know what my heart desired. It was like making out a Christmas wish list and not knowing what you wanted or maybe like wanting it all. Of course, my heart desired that my boys would grow up to be strong faithful Christian men, that the women they married would also be Christians who would love them and help them raise Christian children. My heart desired good health and continued life for my parents. All those basic things that mothers want, I wanted. But, "heart's desire" seemed to me to be like the big one---the one thing above all else--what did I desire? So I went on a prayer quest, asking God to show what His heart desired for me.

I married Eddy just two weeks out of high school and didn't really know how to be single. I was convinced God could use me as a single woman just as He could a married one. So I began to ask God, if I would be more productive as a single woman, teach me how to do this. However, if I would be more productive as a married woman, send the right man to me. I prayed fervently and honestly. I told God all of my needs and frustrations and begged Him to show me what He had planned for me--what He wanted my heart to desire.

My prayers were answered quickly. God sent some Christian men into my life---I began dating. It was both scary and wonderful to be a participant in the dating game again. Before long, I knew that I did indeed desire to get married again. (I also knew I did not want to marry the guys I had dated) So I began asking God, telling Him that I knew my heart desired a man who would love God first and me second---a man who would strive to help me get to heaven--a man who would pray with me and for me--a man who was a minister-not just a preacher--who would serve the Lord and others with me--who would make the best in me seem gigantic and the worst in me minute---a man who could love my children and protect me from my own impulses--someone to walk the Christian journey with me. This is what my heart desired.

God answered that prayer. Ned is all of those things and more. Inside his wedding ring, it is engraved, "Ps 37:4---Heart's Desire". He is an amazing man. Monday was our 9th anniversary and every morning this week, he has brought me a baby rose. He is a true minister and he loves the Lord . . . and me. God is faithful----I will continue to delight in Him because He does care what my heart desires, He promises to give me that and He delivers!!!!!!! (No wonder my heart feels like dancing!!!!)

Delighting in the Lord,
Neva