Dancing in the Light

I John 1:7 "If we walk in the light as He is in the light, we have fellowship one with another, and the blood of Jesus Christ, His Son, cleanses us from all sin."

Location: North Platte, Nebraska, United States

I am a christian wife, mother and grandmother. I am a licensed Social worker and a licensed Christian counselor. I am most proud of the relationships I have with God, my family and friends all over the world. I have been blessed beyond my dreams.

Tuesday, May 22, 2007

The Day I Died

I recently saw an interview with Jean Harris. Harris now 84 spoke about the day she killed famed Scarsdale diet doctor, Herman Tarnower. The two were engaged in a long time affair that had all the shades of a steamy novel. There were episodes of infidelity, prescription drug abuse and a struggle that resulted in the death of the doctor and the conviction of the headmistress. Harris, later pardoned by governor Mario Cuomo, speaks of the day she shot and killed the doctor as "the day she died". She talks about grieving for the doctor and their relationship, grieving for her freedom, saying goodbye to her drug use, to her career, and to her lifestyle of wealth and prestige. Her interview made me think about the day I died.
I remember that day. It was a cool September Wednesday in Columbia Falls, Montana. I was a young mother with three year old and almost one year old sons. We lived out in the country at the base of the beautiful Whitefish Mountain. I'd spent the day alone with the boys, playing, listening to christian music and reading my Bible. My heart was heavy and tears fell with great frequency. I had been examining my life, thinking about where I was and where I came from. I wondered what the way I lived said about who I belonged to. I began to question where I was going and then, how I was going to get there. The thoughts were not merely passing thoughts, fogging up my mind for a brief moment, only to be blown off by more pressing thoughts. No, they came and stayed, setting up camp in my heart and my mind. I fixed supper and got the boys ready---faces washed, hair combed and clean clothes put on. While I got ready, I sat them both on the front step to watch for our ride to church. That evening's lesson was on Romans 6 and the invitation song was number 633---Prepare To Meet Thy God. I was very quiet on the way home, struggling with my heart, struggling with my sins, struggling with the inescapable consequences. As we pulled into the driveway, I began visiting with the minister and his wife. As my convictions overtook me, I knew we had to go back to the church building. And back we went!
That was the day I died. With three adults and two small children in attendance, in a darkened cavernous auditorium, I was to say goodbye to my life as I knew it, but unlike Jean Harris, I did not grieve. I remember coming up out of the water, I remember the lifting of my heart and the arrival of joy and confidence. I remember feeling no shame, no guilt for past sins. I remember feeling empowered, ready to share the gospel message with every single person I would meet. I remember the overwhelming sense of peace that engulfed my soul and seeped into every nook and cranny, even the secret hidden places where sin and shame used to live. For the first time ever, I felt brand new. My old life was gone, replaced by a new and glorious life--a life with purpose, a life with passion--- a life like I'd never known before.
That was the day I died and it was the day I was born again. I will never forget that day. I will never forget what God did for me, never forget the blood sacrifice. Everyday, I try to live this new life, try to be God's woman, a woman with a message. Everyday in this new life, is a day that should be spent walking with God, loving for Him and living for Him. I will always remember that cool September day because that was the day I died. As I work in the Kingdom, every day should be memorable, because everyday is the day I live!



Blogger Monalea said...


I like it! I had never thought about the 'day I died' in this manner. I'm glad you shared. How is the baby?


8:16 AM  
Anonymous brian said...

that's great. thanks for sharing that.

8:23 AM  
Anonymous Chris said...

Great post, Neva. I really appreciate your sharing it with us.

I have been fortunate enough to die twice -- once when I first became a Christian, once when I returned from my prodigal journey and thinking I could live all on my own. What a great day BOTH were, the days I died to self.

Thanks for the reminder.

8:31 AM  
Anonymous lisa leichner said...

Beautiful, Neva.

8:54 AM  
Blogger Liz Moore said...

I've been out of the loop for a while and trying to catch up.

What a powerful testimony! May God continue to bless you as you continue to live for Him. I'm praying for your grandson.

9:06 AM  
Blogger His Girl said...

Another wonderful post, Neva. I have a fond remembrance of the day I died - also in Montana...and also as a young mother! Thank you for sharing!

9:20 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I will never forget the day I died, either. It was 7 years ago next week. That day my life changed and praise God, I will never be the same.
Thoughts of that day are always sweet.
thanks Neva


9:55 AM  
Blogger massivetruth said...

The old self died back when I was 9. But that wasn't the first time I died.

When I was 5 years old, I drowned in a creek bed. My grandmother was down stream and the current pushed my lifeless body into her. My God, our God, decided that was not the end of my journey, but only the beginning. I am very thankful for that!

10:53 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am like Chris, I died twice and am very thankful God raised me both times. Coming home from the "far country" was just as sweet and liberating as claiming him as my savior the first time. Good post today,sister


11:02 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Paula said-

Thanks Neva. Very nice.

11:23 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I remember the day I began dying. Everyday i have to put more of the old man to death and let Christ live in me.


11:32 AM  
Blogger TREY MORGAN said...

I'm glad you died. And, I'm glad you were born again.

We celebrate spiritual birthday's in our house. It's your real birthday.


11:58 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Death becomes you!!


1:09 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dying to the old man and living as a new creature is the thrill of a lifetime. Thanks for sharing yours.


2:10 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I remember the day I died, too. I was terminally ill with a sin problem. The blood of Jesus cured me and gave me "remission". Now I get to live forever. Praise God!

Interested Bystander

3:04 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

My husband and I died on the same day. March 25, 2007--we will never forget that day. Neva, I read your blog everyday and I always want to tell you how much I appreciate all you did for me and Judd. I dont know the words to say. Nothing seems to say it well enough. We would be lost literally, without you. How do you thank someone for that? Thanks for being who you are.


3:08 PM  
Blogger Don said...

It is good to remember that day.


3:43 PM  
Blogger The Preacher's Household: said...

I died at midnight so I have never known if I should say it was the 21st or 22nd of October. It was very special, I went in my old self and came out new on a new day. It was a cool observation that one of the witnesses made and I had no idea what time it was. Well, I knew it was time for me to commit to Christ.
Thanks for the great write up!

4:05 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You make me smile--your post today reminded me of my conversion. Salvation is such a great thing and sometimes we forget. Thank you for the reminder.


6:24 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

We dont truly start living until we die. Good post.


9:09 PM  
Blogger The Preacher's Household: said...

really good!


9:45 PM  
Blogger Bill said...

Beautiful, simply beautiful!

Thanks for sharing your story, Neva!!

Praise the Lord!!!


10:38 PM  
Blogger MUISTO said...

Dear Neva, I came over from Beba.

What a great post this was. I will never forget my second birthday as well and it has changed my life forever!

3:02 AM  
Blogger Lori said...

Once again your post lift my spirits.

6:24 AM  
Anonymous Scotti said...

So blessed to be here today.

Love your posts.


8:33 AM  
Blogger Nicki said...

What a touching testimony......thanks for sharing!

9:45 AM  
Blogger Kathy said...

How sweet was that "death" at 1:15AM one chilly November morning/night in Mexico City, buried in water [in an over-sized bathtub, coming up to a fresh, pure new life.

Thanks, Neva for reminding me of that blessed night!

10:02 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This post fits so well. Donna was baptized tonight. Larry had to work but I just know he is close, too. Judd and I have been praying so hard for them. Please keep praying for Larry. I know he is ready too. Brother SPence is really good and careful not to push. It is hard for me because I want to push. I am trying to be patient. I know you won't read this until tomorrow but I just wanted you to know.

12:06 AM  
Blogger Neva said...

I am so excited about your news. Tell Donna I am praying for her. I will pray for Larry too. Sharing the gospel with someone else is amazing and seeing them respond is just as amazing. I am very proud of you and Judd.

6:30 AM  
Blogger Leigh Gray said...

what an incredible post - you are an incredible writer. I have enjoyed being on your blgo!!

Have a great day!

8:18 AM  
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9:10 PM  

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