Dancing in the Light

I John 1:7 "If we walk in the light as He is in the light, we have fellowship one with another, and the blood of Jesus Christ, His Son, cleanses us from all sin."

Location: North Platte, Nebraska, United States

I am a christian wife, mother and grandmother. I am a licensed Social worker and a licensed Christian counselor. I am most proud of the relationships I have with God, my family and friends all over the world. I have been blessed beyond my dreams.

Saturday, October 28, 2006


I am spending the weekend with two of my five grandchildren in Lubbock. I shared a room with Madi last night. We did not sleep. She was restless all night long and at age 4 she could voice what was wrong. She had bad dreams, did not feel well and wanted her mother.

I recently saw an interview wherein the woman said if you look up the word "mother" in the dictionary you will find it is a verb first and then a noun. I thought that was very very interesting. That nurturing, caring, protecting part of us is what makes us mothers. From the time our children are born, they want their mothers, even when daddies are involved and loving and nurturing also. When we don't feel well or have bad dreams, we want our mothers. I also think it is interesting that fathers have God as an example of what fathers are to be. There is not an example of mothers because God made mothering, the verb, inherent in mothers, the noun.
I know there are some who have repressed the mothering emotion and that makes me incredibly sad. I also know that there are many women who do not have children. But, most of them mother something else, either pets or men, or parents, or something.

Last night, I could offer Madi nothing that would make her happy. She only wanted her mother and nothing else would do. Even though I am a mother and my lap rocks and my arms hug, I am not her mother and was therefore not adequate. Likewise, when I am hurt or upset, I want my mother. She lives far away but the phone works and with new calling plans, she is readily available, as I am to my children and when they need me, I do my best to get there, to offer support, encouragement and nurturing. I am so grateful for a Christian mother who comforts and nurtures me just like Larissa comforted and nurtured Madi last night. When I want my mom, everyone else is inadequate.

What a great responsibility and awesome privilege it is to be a mother. I am so thankful that God instinlled in me "mother".


Friday, October 27, 2006


I have often thought if I could go back and raise my boys again, I would do more teaching about consequences. Every choice we make, good or bad, has conseequences. Every action we take also has consequences, even accidents. For instance, if I spill my milk at breakfast, the consequence is that there may be no more milk, I have to clean it up, I may have to change my clothes if some spilled over and at the very least, it costs me some time.
Consequences and punishment are not the same thing. In Deuteronomy 32 at the end of the chapter, God is talking to Moses about the end of the leader's life. He (God) tells Moses that although he has been leading the children of the Israel for about 40 years, leading them, guiding them, encouraging them with talk of the Promised Land, he (Moses) will only see the land from a distance. God tells Moses that this is a consequence of Moses breaking faith with God in the presence of the Israelites and not "upholding His holiness". When Moses made a choice to strike the rock at Kadesh, rather than speak to it as God commanded, he set himself up to pay a consequence. God said that choice showed that Moses did not trust in Him enough to honor Him as holy in the sight of the Israelites.
Now imagine spending the greater part of your life leading a rebellious people, living with them through the plagues and the chase of the Egyptians, the parting of the Red Sea, disciplining them when they formed the golden calf, relaying the words spoken directly to you by God on a mt, all the time encouraging them with hope of the promised land and then you, yourself not making it to the reward. I am sure that would seem like punishment. But, punishment is meant to teach, to bring about a change of action, to encourage obedience. Even the final punishment of hell teaches regret and we are told every knee will bow, and all will call on the name of the Lord. They will see the recklessness of their ways but it will be too late. The residents of hell will be eternally unforgiven. That is their punishment.
While Moses had to suffer consequences, we know that God forgave him. In Matthew 17, during the transfiguration, who is with Jesus? Moses and Elijah. He is with them when God's voice admonishes the disciples to listen to Jesus. When Christians sin, the blood of Jesus takes away our punishment, but we are still required to take care of the consequences. I think too many times, we believe when our sins are washed away, so are all the consequences. That is not true!!! If I engaged in sexually inappropriate behaviors and contracted HIV or an STD, even when I repent and have my sins washed away, I still have the disease--a consequence of my choices. If I am a poor steward of the financial blessings I have received, and I repent and make every effort to be fiscally responsible, the act of repentance has no effect on my low credit score.
Consequences are a part of our every day choices and they are how we learn to make better choices. We must act carefully and thoughtfully lest our actions cost more than we can afford. While we pay the price for our consequences, we can be grateful that our Savior paid the price for our salvation and while consequences are temporary, salvation is eternal.

Careful of the consquences

Thursday, October 26, 2006


Have you ever been on the verge of tears--when a comment is all it takes to open the emotional floodgates? Have you ever cried yourself to sleep? When your heart is that heavy, there is no reasoning that can lift that burden, no conversation, no words of comfort, nothing that helps. Our heads may say that we have so much to be thankful, that we have to much to do to "meltdown", that we need to just "get over it". But, when we have reached the point that our emotions are raw and our heart, as well as our tear ducts, are full, sometimes we just need to cry.
Last night at church, we sang a song called "Bring Christ Your Broken Life". It is a beautiful song with amazing words. Last night, I think, was the first time I'd noticed these words to the third verse. "Bring Him your weariness, Receive His rest, Weep out your blinding tears Upon His breast. His love is wonderful, His power is great. 'And none that trust in Him, Shall be desolate." Aren't those incredible words? Can you imagine, our Lord and Savior taking us into His arms and soothing us, patting our backs, and stroking our hair as our tears soak His clothing? He comforts us because He loves us and He understands any and all of our pain. He is able to console us simply by His presence. The knowledge that He is always near, that He will never leave us or forsake us and that He understands the overwhelming emotions is great consolation.
The last verse of the song says "Blest Savior of us all! Almighty Friend! His presence shall be ours Unto the end. Without Him life would be How dark, how drear! But with Him morning breaks-and heaven is near!'

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

The Joy of The Lord

The dictionary defines "joy" as "an emotion of great delight or happiness caused by something exceptionally good or satisfying." Don't you just love that? Especially when we sing the song, "The Joy of the Lord is my Strength". That song is taken from the book of Nehemiah. The priest, Ezra has just read to book of law to God's children. It says that everyone who could understand stood and listened attentively from morning until noon and then they were so moved by God's Word that they wept. Nehemiah tells them not to weep but to celebrate because the "the joy of the Lord is their strength". Wow! Imagine what a powerful scene that was. To be so enthralled and moved to tears by God's word and then the gentle reminder---that we have strength from God and His joy ---How could God not be rejoicing over this scene?
The idea that our Father looks down on us and has "an emotion of great delight or happiness caused by something exceptionally good or satisfying" is very humbling. We think often of God as the Sacrificial, Loving, Just, Faithful, Creating, All knowing God but we seldom think of Him as a Joyful God.
What brings God joy? We know the obvious answers, loving and obedient children. And I know that indeed makes Him happy. Yet, we brought Him joy before we even were. Ephesians 1 talks about how God chose us, fell in love with us, even before He created us. Eugene Peterson in his paraphrase, The Message, puts it this way. "Long long ago He decided to adopt us into His family through Jesus Christ. (What pleasure He took in planning this!) Long before we first heard of Christ and got our hopes up, He had His eye on us, had designs on us for glorious
living . . ." . Is that not amazing!!!! We brought Him joy before He gave us life!!! And if we believe that, we cannot help but be strong.

The Joy of the Lord is my Strength!!!


Tuesday, October 24, 2006

A Safe Place To Live

The news said this month was the bloodiest month so far in the war in Iraq. I listen as pro-war and anti-war believers argue with each other about whether we should quit the war and bring our soldiers home or stay until we are victorious. Both sides are convinced they are right. They believe they are far apart. And while their solutions are different, I believe they both want the same thing---a safe place to live. safe for our country, safe for our soldeirs and safe for all mankind.

Safety is important to all of us. Safety gives us peace and comfort and the ability to use our energies to function and accomplish our daily tasks. We get home security systems, lock our valuables in safety deposit boxes and make sure our cars have alarms. We are cautious about where we walk and how we walk and some of us take self defense classes. The desire for the safety of ourselves and our loved ones is a noble one, but I wonder if sometimes we focus so much on keeping the earthly things safe that we don't think about the spiritual things.

Psalm 91:9-11 says "If you make the Most High your dwelling place . . .then no harm will befall you, no disaster will come near your tent. For He will command His angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways, they will lift you up so that you will not strike your foot against a stone."

As long as we abide in Him, He and His angels keep our souls safe. We have the peace and comfort of knowing when our Father is watching over us, nothing can harm us. Abiding in the Father means we don't just visit Him, we live there. In Him we are safe, but when we live in the world, we have need to protect ourselves. How wonderful that our Father, the creator of all has chosen to protect us. Only in His home, can we feel secure.


Monday, October 23, 2006

My Cup and My Portion

I have been a bit discouraged lately. I have been looking for a job with no results. If you have ever been on this mission, you may know just how much it affects how you think about yourself. I ask God what is wrong with me that no one wants to hire me. I ask Him what exactly He has in mind for me, (because I believe He has something planned). I ask Him what I am supposed to be learning from this experience and most of all, I ask Him how long it's going to last.

I have been here before and I remember having just as little patience then as I do now. I remember the frustration and the agony of looking and looking. I also remember what happened when I finally fell to my knees and asked God to help me wait for Him and accept whatever He sent my way. I prayed He would calm my spirit and give me peace. I prayed He would help me stop working and worrying so much so I could see and appreciate His hand working in my life. Today, I find myself in that place again---on my knees, tears in my eyes, but anticipating the peace my Father sends.

Psalm 16: 1 says ". . . You are my Lord and apart from you I have no good thing"----later in vs. 5&6 it says " . . . Lord, you have assigned me my portion and my cup; you have made my lot secure, the boundary lines fall for me in pleasant places; surely I have a delightful inheritance."

I do not know what God has in store for me, but I know that what He has given me in the past has been magnificent. He has never let me down. He is a promise keeping God and He wants the best for me. He has assigned for me what I need and I am confident I have a "delightful inheritance".

Waiting on the Lord,

Sunday, October 22, 2006

Sometimes Ya Gotta Shine

Have you ever watched a children's school program? Usually about 20 kids walk in single file--they step up onto risers and face a crowd of proud parents and grandparents. The teacher gets everyones attention and then nods to the piano player and the program begins. I love these programs. I smile at the one or two in every group who sing with all their might. They stand up straight, smile real big and sing at the top of their lungs. They don't seem to notice that they are not harmonizing with the rest of the group, or that they may not be singing on key---they just sing and they seem to enjoy it immensely. They are the star of the show and how they shine!!!

We could learn so much from these "Shining Stars". In Philippians 2:9, Paul tells us that we are to stand out from the crowd---we are to be pure and blameless unlike the crooked and depraved generation in which we live. In doing so, we shine like stars. We stand out and don't look like the rest of the group. Like these child stars, we stand up straight and we smile really big and we sing with all our might, we live with all our might and we SHINE!!!!!

We don't shine just for the purpose of shining. In Matthew 5 we are told to let our lights shine so we glorify the Father in Heaven. That child in the front row, singing at the top of her lungs, she does that to get her parents attention and to make them proud. That is why we shine, it makes our Father proud.

So as we start this next week, I am going to make every effort to stand up straight, focus, smile great big and sing my heart out. I am going to shine and enjoy it immensely!!!! Watch my Father smile.

Daniel 12:3 ". . . those who lead many to righteousness will shine like the stars forever."


Saturday, October 21, 2006


I have been thinking about my blessings, thanking God for all the wonderful and amazing people He has put in my life. This week, especially, I have been thinking about my daughters-in-law. There are not a lot of daughter-in-laws mentioned in the Bible. We know that Noah's sons and their wives were on the ark with him for many many days. (I am not sure being on a giant boat with their mother-in-law, thousands of animals, day after day of rain and the knowledge that they were the last living humans on earth would be fun for Traci and Larissa ) While the text doesn't say what the relationship was, we could assume it became a close one given they were the only four women on earth. We know there were other daughter-in-laws but we are not privy to their stories either.

But, we have many details about one mother and daughter-in-law relationship. Of course, we have the story of Ruth and Naomi. If you remember, Ruth was married to one of Naomi's son. Naomi was a widow and after ten years, Ruth's husband was also killed, as well as Naomi's other son. Anyway, Naomi decides to return to her homeland. She makes this decision based on knowledge that in her homeland, widows will be provided for, therefore she would not be a burden to her daughters-in-law. She encourages them to return to their homelands and marry again. As she prepares to leave, these two young women make arrangements to go with her. Naomi discourages them from leaving with her. She calls them "my daughters". We all know the story, how Ruth begs to go with her mother in law and ends up married to Boaz and is in the lineage of our Savior. Her stirring monologue to Naomi is used in many 20th century wedding ceremonies as a vow of devotion to one's mate. What I love about this story is not just the devotion Ruth has for Naomi, but also that Naomi has to both her daughters-in-law. The fact she calls them "daughter" and wishes the best for them, even a new husband, is wonderful to me.

From the time my boys were born, I began praying for their future wives. God is good and He has given me wonderful daughters-in-law. Both of them are from Christian families and carry with them the same values my sons were raised with. They love their husbands, they adore their children and they are very good to Ned and I. I knew both of these girls before my sons did and being friends with them before they became family, only sweetened the relationships.
Having not had a relationship with them from birth, I don't know the events that molded them and shaped them into the brilliant and beautiful young women they are today. I do know that I am grateful to their parents and their grandparents for the role they played.

They are good to me, like Ruth was to Naomi. In chapter 4:15 of Ruth, it says, you daughter-in-law, who loves you and is better to you than seven sons has given birth." My grandchildren are the most amazing combination of their mothers and fathers. They are gentle and kind and funny and smart and absolutely beautiful, a lot like their mothers. These beautiful children are such blessings. Just as their parents are.

While I can never take the place of their own mothers, these young women are indeed my "daughters". I could no more magine life without them than I could imagine life without Chad or Nathan. In Psalm 127, God says children are a reward from Him. He rewarded me with two sons of my own and then again when the boys married Traci and Larissa. What an awesome God, He just keeps on giving and giving!!!

May you all be blest as I have been,

Friday, October 20, 2006

Grandma's Geraniums

As the season quickly changes and winter begins to creep in, we have developed certain seasonal rituals. We keep our bird feeder full of seed, we roll up the hoses, and we move our geraniums in every night and out every morning. Before long, we will be moving them inside full time to protect them from the freezing cold and snow.

They are two big red geraniums and of all our plants, they are special. I got them almost three years ago at my grandmother's funeral and they remind me of her. I have hauled them from Missouri to Nebraska to Texas. They have endured bitter cold and scorching heat. They have almost died several times but we have babied them back to health. Right now, they are blooming and beautiful and they remind me of her.

We grew up near my maternal grandmother, and I have so many memories of grandma's house, sweetened tea, walking to the movies, bacon sandwiches, ice frozen in big coffee cans, Mountain Dew in bottles and geraniums. Grandma always had the most beautiful geraniums, great big ones, pink ones, white ones and of course, red ones. She kept them well tended and I never see or smell a geranium without thinking of her.

My grandma was always a good lady---but she did not become a Christian until later in life, sometime around age 80. She loved her family and even when she was unwell, she wanted to be where family was. She was an avid letter writer and kept up with extended family no matter how far away. She was well-loved. At her funeral, I watched and listened as those who loved her came to say goodbye. There were many many kind words, many remembered and cherished stories and many reflections on Grandma's character. We talked about how much my Grandma loved others and how strong she was and how she always had her fingernails painted. But, the one comment I heard again and again was , "she never said anything bad about anyone else". So many said it that it had to be true. I searched my memory and like the others could not find one time when this woman had made disparaging comments about another. WOW!!! I was humbled by that testimony to her character, what a witness for the Lord!!!!

So now, everyday when I see these geraniums and I tend them and feed them and water them, they remind me of grandma and the kind of woman I want to be. I loved my grandma, and in fact, am named after her. But, I want to be like her in more than just name, I want to be kind, gentle, merciful and I want to say kind things. The geraniums remind me of the legacy of Geneva Ellen Harvey---a legacy to which I aspire. I know her character as well as her geraniums took some care, she fed them and watered them, she exposed them to the light and she broke off the dead parts. And because she did that, they grew and bloomed and spread. For me, these flowers remind me that I need to get my sustenance from God's Word, I need to be exposed to the Light and I need to cut away the old dead Neva that still wants to sin sometimes. If I do this, I will bloom and grow and spread. And I will be able to bless others. The geraniums are a reminder.

Ephesians 4:29-- "Do not let any unwholesome word come out of your mouth . . . "

Growing like grandma's geraniums,

Thursday, October 19, 2006

"Who Loves You"

If you ask any of my grandchildren "who loves you", they will immediately say, "Grandma" or "My Grandma". They know this because I have told them many times that I love them. And when I am with them I hold them, play with them, sing with them and read to them. I buy them gifts and take them places. I fix them foods they love to eat and give them sweet treats. They know that I will protect them and that no matter what, I will never ever stop loving them. While they cannot possibly grasp how much or how deep I love them, they KNOW I do.
I think it is the same way with us and God. We know He loves us because He tells us so many times. He protects and cares for us, provides for our needs, longs to spend time with us, and gives us many gifts and blessings. We cannot begin to grasp how deep or how much He loves us. We know the verses--John 3:16, Romans 5:8, I John 3:1---That He loved us so much, even when we were at our worst, He sent His Son to die for us, so that we could live with Him forever.

This kind of love I have difficulty with. I remember sitting in church one Sunday morning, sitting between my two boys. As they passed the communion I looked at these two beautiful children (although they were both taller than I already) and tried to fathom how much love one would have to have to give their child. As tears streamed down my face, I realized I could not ever comprehend how great a love that is. I also realized that I do not have to understand its depth to appreciate the gift.

My grandchildren may never understand just how much I love them, but they will always know that I do---they can depend on my love and will hopefully find comfort and courage in that love. The courage and comfort I get from just knowing my Father loves me with an unfailing and everlasting love sustains me and my inability to grasp its magnificence makes the gift even more precious.
Jeremiah 31:3 "I have loved you with an everlasting love"
Because I KNOW He loves me,

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Heart's Desire

My favorite verse in the entire Bible (I guess I have a lot ot them) is Psalm 37:4---"Delight in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart." I stumbled on this verse when I was a young widow and single mom. I was searching for an identity, direction, a purpose. When I buried my husband, I buried with him our plans for the future, our goals together and a lot of my identity. I remember being a bit disconcerted by the verse because I really didn't know what my heart desired. It was like making out a Christmas wish list and not knowing what you wanted or maybe like wanting it all. Of course, my heart desired that my boys would grow up to be strong faithful Christian men, that the women they married would also be Christians who would love them and help them raise Christian children. My heart desired good health and continued life for my parents. All those basic things that mothers want, I wanted. But, "heart's desire" seemed to me to be like the big one---the one thing above all else--what did I desire? So I went on a prayer quest, asking God to show what His heart desired for me.

I married Eddy just two weeks out of high school and didn't really know how to be single. I was convinced God could use me as a single woman just as He could a married one. So I began to ask God, if I would be more productive as a single woman, teach me how to do this. However, if I would be more productive as a married woman, send the right man to me. I prayed fervently and honestly. I told God all of my needs and frustrations and begged Him to show me what He had planned for me--what He wanted my heart to desire.

My prayers were answered quickly. God sent some Christian men into my life---I began dating. It was both scary and wonderful to be a participant in the dating game again. Before long, I knew that I did indeed desire to get married again. (I also knew I did not want to marry the guys I had dated) So I began asking God, telling Him that I knew my heart desired a man who would love God first and me second---a man who would strive to help me get to heaven--a man who would pray with me and for me--a man who was a minister-not just a preacher--who would serve the Lord and others with me--who would make the best in me seem gigantic and the worst in me minute---a man who could love my children and protect me from my own impulses--someone to walk the Christian journey with me. This is what my heart desired.

God answered that prayer. Ned is all of those things and more. Inside his wedding ring, it is engraved, "Ps 37:4---Heart's Desire". He is an amazing man. Monday was our 9th anniversary and every morning this week, he has brought me a baby rose. He is a true minister and he loves the Lord . . . and me. God is faithful----I will continue to delight in Him because He does care what my heart desires, He promises to give me that and He delivers!!!!!!! (No wonder my heart feels like dancing!!!!)

Delighting in the Lord,

Tuesday, October 17, 2006


It seems that one cannot turn on the television without hearing about the world's need for peace. The war in Iraq, the North Korean pending conflict, the school shootings and numerous acts of violence in our country. It is so disturbing and yet our own personal worlds are often so chaotic that there is no peace there, either. I have recently found my world sorely lacking in peace. When we left North Platte, NE, we both left a place that we loved very much. We had a beautiful home, a wonderful church family and jobs that we loved. We felt that God was leading us elsewhere. Our move to Lubbock was not pleasant---in fact, it was truly our time in the desert. We could not find jobs, we spent all our savings, we could not find our niche to work in the church, our friends from the past were all very busy, we gained weight and became depressed. (the only good thing was getting to be closer to two of my grandchildren for the first time in their lives ) I began to doubt God's work in my life. My spirit was not at peace.

Since that time in early May, I have spent much time in God's word and in prayer searching for that peace I'd once had. I began reading Psalms, as I often do when I am struggling. And lo and behold, I stumbled on Psalm 119:165---It says "Great peace have those who love your law and nothing can make them stumble". What an amazing passage---then I found Psalm 85:10 that talks about the entertwining relationship of love and faithfulness and peace and righteousness. I quickly realized that peace had only fled from me because my heart was no longer conducive. My heart had changed its focus ---I was worried about money, jobs, friends, etc. I was not focused on love, faithfulness and righteousness. Being faithful and righteous even in the desert produces an oasis of peace. While my time in the desert is not yet ended, I am so grateful God put those verses in my Bible to give me hope and I pray I don't forget them again.

Monday, October 16, 2006

The Title

Both of my daughter-in-laws are bloggers and visiting their blogs has hooked me. I decided to start my own blog because we have recently relocated and I miss my very close friends in Nebraska, Lubbock. Oregon, etc. I thought this would be yet another way to keep in contact with them.

I chose the title for this blog from one of my favorite verses in the Bible. I John 1:7--it talks about walking in the light and is talking about our "Christian life journey". While on this journey, I have been blessed beyond what I dream or deserve and have found my spirit so full of joy that, like a child, I am not content, nor am I able to keep my feet at a walk, I am dancing!!!!!!
I grew up in a Christian home, in a rural area surrounded by extended family, oozing with family love and values. I have been married to two Christian men, one of whom is waiting in Heaven. I have truly two of the most amazing sons. They are both entirely different but godly men who love their wives, support their families and adore their children. My grandchildren are beautiful and brilliant. The five of them are as diverse as can be but all behave like children who are loved by their parents and raised for the Lord. I have friends and family in several states and countries. I am currently a minister's wife and am able to work full time with him for the Lord. My parents are healthy and happy. What more could I ask?
Everyday I am more cognizant of the abundant blessings in my life and as I dance through the day I try to find ways to share that joy with others.
It is my hope that as you visit this site, you will be encouraged and will soon find a melody in your heart and feet that cannot help but tap out the time.
Lets Dance!!!!!